the beef.

WARNING:  The following is a vent session.

There are three things that you should know about me.

1.  I prefer to be barefoot.
2.  I like the way shoes look... on other people but I don't really care to wear shoes, unless of course they are flip flops.
3.  If I have to wear shoes I require a good pair of socks.

Which brings me to my beef.  A few years ago I was introduced to the greatest pair of socks.  They are made by Champion.  A standard white athletic crew sock, with a cushion toe and heel, soft cotton, and a snug no slouch fit.  They are fantastic.  Truly.  Problem is I CAN'T FIND THEM ANYWHERE!!!!!!!!!  And... I need socks.  I've been searching for a year to no avail. 

So last week I resigned to purchase a "lesser" sock.  Hanes.  They are not comfortable, they slouch, and are overall substandard.  I hate them.  To make matters worse, no less than 4 hours of wearing the second pair of socks I take off my shoe, look down, and see... a run.  A RUN!!  IN MY SOCKS!!!!  Who knew that was possible?!  I mean, really.  Isn't that shame reserved for pantyhose... the single most uncomfortable article of clothing a woman can wear!  I had my Champion socks for over three years with zero holes.  Zero runs.  They are what the name brand says.  Champions.  Total perfection.  I HATE Hanes socks.  Hate them.  HATE THEM! 

'tis the season.

“The man who forgets to be thankful has fallen asleep in life."  - Robert Louis Stevenson

'Tis the season for Thanksgiving!  Truly it is a month to remember all of the blessings of this life.  And, I started off this month by giving thanks for the fact that I PASSED MY LISW EXAM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Hallelujah!  The following is my acceptance speech:

To all those who have put up with my fret and worry... to all my teachers for making my life difficult so that I could learn... to all those who prayed daily that I would be okay... to my friends for feeding my ego with constant votes of confidence... to my parents for encouraging me to develop my talents to their fullest and spending their lives in working and sacrificing so that I could have the opportunity...and to the One who brings peace and assurance... I say Thank You.

darktime.

Let's get one thing straight.  The only time "going dark" is cool is in spy movies ...or maybe midnight capture the flag.  Not cool when it's 7:00pm and dark.  Really not cool when the time changes and it's dark by 5:30pm.  I'm all about having four seasons but does it really have to get dark before 8:00pm?  It's kinda depressing.  And dark.

? is made for me.

? = BEACH



That's right!  The beach was made just for me.  My September vacation started off with a trip to the beach.  Below are some picture highlights.  More to come as the week vacation progresses.  Be sure to check out the dolphins.  There were so many and they were close enough to swim with.  They hung out on the coast all morning each day. 

 

 

A is for adultery.

*** For privacy all names in the following true story have been changed to protect the identity of those involved.

I teach a Primary class at church.  All the children in my class are in their 8th year and are preparing to be baptized.  Some have already turned 8 and some are still waiting.  Today our lesson was on obeying the law.  The lesson started out okay.  The children were a little more on the rowdy side than usual.  It may have been the play dough that I brought for them to use in a hands on visual aid project that set them off.  I'm just saying.

(Side note: The play dough was a little floury and left behind a salty residue.  We proceeded without aprons.  And I let the children keep their play dough ball at the end of lesson.  They didn't let go of it or stop handling all through sharing time.  You see where this is going.  There is only one thing that can happen here... yep, everyone left looking like they had spent a day in a bakery.  Pants and skirts were not meant to be napkins.  Note to self... which is likely way more apparent to those who have kids... but bring wet naps next time and little plastic baggies in which to store the dough.  I'm a work in progress.)

At any rate it took a while to get settled in the lesson but once settled they were pretty focused.  We started discussing what rules are and their purpose.  We then moved to rules that God gives us, the commandments.  The ultimate plan was then to go on to discuss laws of the land and how as members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints we believe in obeying the laws of the land.  But I digress.  Back to the commandments.  Several of the children vocalized different commandments.

JoJo:  "Don't lie."
Raul:  "Don't steal."
Max:  "Don't kill.  That's really bad."
And then Nan, "Adultery!"  Ruh roh.  I was secretly hoping they were too young to know that word.  She even pronounced it correctly.  Then I was hoping that it could be something that could be breezed over by a quick change of the subject.  That's when the following scenario unfolded.  Before I could recover...

Nan: "That's what the mayor did."

Really?!  I knew exactly who she was talking about.  Our beloved South Carolina governor who cheated on his wife with a woman in Argentina, on the government dime, while providing very strange public lies about it.  It made national news and stayed there... for months.  If you somehow missed it you can find it by clicking on the link Sanford Admits Affair .  In an effort to not make a big deal out of the statement I attempted a simple reflection and move to change the subject.

Me: "That IS what the mayor did. Now.."

But I was cut off... by Raul!  Who was playing with his play dough and who I thought wasn't even paying attention.  Without breaking stride, or even looking up he says...

Raul: "That's what Mayor Sanford did when he went after that woman in Argentina."

Really?!  Really.  How do they know this stuff?  I don't remember being that aware when I was 8.  Again, before I can recover and move on...

JoJo: "But what is adultery?  What does that mean?"

Great.  Now ALL 6 pairs of eyes are focused intently on me.  No more playing with play dough.  No more nose picking, flicking their neighbor, staring at the ceiling.  No... all eyes on me.  Deep breath.

Me: "Well, adultery is ... well.   When a husband and wife get married the rule is ... they are only supposed to be with each other.  Sometimes a mom or a dad might break that rule and have a boyfriend or a girlfriend.  But, it is AGAINST THE RULES.  It IS NOT ALLOWED.  IT SHOULD NEVER EVER HAPPEN."

Somebody save me please.  I start to move on.  But I was interrupted once again.

JoJo: "What happened to the mayor?  Did his wife know?  Are they still together?"

You've got to be kidding me.

Me: "His wife was not happy that he BROKE THE RULES.  They tried to make it better but the mayor didn't want to follow the rules.  They got divorced."

Lots of sad looks... but don't worry.  I didn't take a breath.  Between the last sentence and...

Me: "Let's talk about laws.  What are laws?"

Thankfully they moved on.  The rest of lesson went well.  Sharing time went well.  Despite the fact that they played with their dough balls the entire time they all remained reverent in their activity and paid better attention to sharing time and music time.  Weird.  Needless to say, when they left for the day they were covered in that salty floury residue and no doubt gearing to report to their parents that their lesson was on "Mayor" Sanford and his affair with the Argentinian homewrecker.  I left church knowing that within the hour I would be getting phone calls about the lesson in adultery and the mess in which I sent home their child.  Nice.

BTW:  It's been 9 hours and no calls.  Fingers crossed.

before & after.

So, um, yeah... it's kinda been a long time since I blogged. Sorry bout that. I had all the intentions of doing so and well, I just have been feeling a little lazy. I recently got my hair cut. Yep. Finally did it. I now have bangs. True story. The last time I had those babies was in middle school, and well, pictures from those three years were enough to traumatize me for the past 19 years. Yep, you heard that right. Nineteen years!!!!! What better way to celebrate the passing of another year then biting the bullet and getting a new do. And truth be told... I'm really enjoying them so far. So here are some before and after pics.

Before... Pretty much had this same hairstyle since high school.  Yeah, I've parted it different directions and occasionally cut it all off and gave it way, but for the most part it has been the same.  It's a weird angle but it was soooo long. Try taking a picture of all that hair without having to enter landscape mode.  It's not like I'm 6' tall.  I'm working with a limited wingspan.

And after... Please ignore my crazy eyes.  I blame it on the flash.  Also I lightened my hair a wee bit but you can't tell in the pics.  Guess you'll just have to find a way to see me in person. :)  All in all I LOVE it!  It has been a really fun change for me.  She even took some of the weight off the bottom of my hair and gave me some long layers.  It's easy to do and given my low maintenance lifestyle that is perfect for me.

For those curious viewers... these pictures were taken on two different days with two different shirts on.  Just happen to be a big fan of green.  I do practice good hygiene and enjoy clean smelling clothes.  Over and out.

fundraiser.

my profile page.

No, not as in online dating... although I do like long walks on the beach, fresh flowers, etc.  It's a missionary profile page.  Seriously... could that be any cooler?  I think not.  Tonight for my own FHE and since I'm a family of one, I took the sister missionaries out for dinner and decided that for my activity I would finish updating my missionary profile page for the new mormon.org which will be unveiled sometime this summer.  It was a whole lotta fun.  If you haven't tried it you totally should.  Just click here.  There is something about going back to the basics that just reaffirms the truth of it all.  Maybe that's why I loved being a missionary so much.  There is comfort and peace in the truth.  I can't think of a greater gift to share.

Here are some of my favorite people from the mission... engaged in what?? An FHE activity!!

                                    

some lessons learned.

Some things that have been on my mind lately.  All true stories.

1.  A strut is always followed by a stumble.

2.  A couple of minutes in computer time is four hours in real time.

3.  If you fight the law, the law will win.

4.  Karma.  It can be your BFF or your worst nightmare.

5.  There are few things in life better than ice cream.

6.  No drink is good enough to cost $12 dollars.  That's a 1/3 a tank of gas, 2 meals, or a whole lotta farmer's market products.

7.  Laughter is good medicine.  But so is the beach.

tasty food, good company, and the Y.

It is about time I finish my blog update on my trip out West. And a great trip it was. All in all I was there from Sunday to Sunday. I flew in and my sister picked me up. We hit up a local Sacrament meeting and then headed to my cousins' ranch. My home away from home. I LOVE it there. It is so peaceful and I love spending time with my family. Here are some pics of the view from the bridge and the room where Em, Mo, and I slept. When I say slept... it was more like passed out. You go to the ranch and you get really really good sleep.

And while we were there we got spoiled. Jenny made some of our favorite foods. And to top it off she made the most scrumptious desserts. Our last night there she made strawberry shortcake with homemade whip cream and these gigantic sugar cookies. They were the size of our heads. No lie.

After a couple days we had to head back to Provo so Em could take her last final before graduation. Pobrecita. On the way back I took lots of pics from the car. I might be a little obsessed with scenery while driving. It's just so beautiful and so unique. The mountains along the road out of Wyoming and into Utah look like they should have a Native American chief atop a horse right on the peak. I always look up to check just in case.

While in Provo I got to visit with old friends.  Dinah and I met up at had Mexican... Cafe Rio.  Thinking the name of the restaurant makes me drool.  I spent time with her adorable kids and her cute little pregnant belly.  And then, as if I wasn't lucky enough to see her pregnant she had her baby while I was there too!

I also got to visit some other old friends, including my dear mission comp Emili.  Sadly I didn't get a pic of that visit, but it was such a fun time.  And doubly sad, I didn't get to see everyone I had planned on seeing.  I just didn't have enough time.  Hopefully it won't be too long before I can have another fun vacation there.  

While there we as a family had decided to hike the Y, since me, Em, and dad had all gone to school there but none of us had ever before made the trek.  We spent all day moving Em out of her apartment, she lived on the 3rd floor (that's not including the stairwell to the garage).  Like that wasn't exhausting enough.  Em took us to J-Dawgs for lunch.  It was really tasty.  Up to that point I was a J-Dawgs virgin.  Then it was time to hike the Y.  I'm not gonna lie, that trek kicked my butt.  That may or may not have to do with me being out of shape but we all collectively decided to blame it on the "altitude".  It was hard but so fun.  I'm so grateful for the chance to spend time with my sister and parents.  We had a lot of good conversation and lots of good laughs.  Here are some pics of our journey.

And finally, here are some last minute sights of Provo, in case you haven't been overloaded by this post already.  Here goes.

The end.

our little graduate.

Here are some brief highlights from the Emdog's graduation...

1. Where in the world is Emily Phipps? She's in there I promise. (Traditional processional into the commencement).

Here is a little hint if you can't find her:

2. Elder D. Todd Christofferson spoke at the commencement. He rocks. He is super funny. Here is a little tidbit from his closing remarks. After it was all over he gave all the grads a bunch of thumbs up. Swell fella.

3. A quick family shot following the commencement.

4. The following day we attended the ceremony for Emily's college of Family, Home, and Social Sciences. Long ceremony but totally worth the wait. Watch as she walks across the stage, off, and gives the camerawoman (me) a big thumbs up. Ps... you'll only hear her last name right at the beginning.



5. And, some accompanying photos...



6. Finally, the after party.

Congratulations Bo Peep! You made it!!!